None For Gretchen Weiners

Stuff I like that you might also enjoy

You better Beliebe it.

On this most glorious of days, let us all praise God for the cornucopia of blessings at our hands: eighteen new Justin Bieber songs (I know, right?! EIGHTEEN!).

I just want to take a moment and thank Mr. Bieber for providing us all with a solid hour of pure aural magic. Thank you, Mr. Bieber.

For those of you who live under a rock are unaware, JB’s new album, Believe was released today (I accidentally didn’t buy the Deluxe Edition at first… huge mistake… you’ll see why in a bit). Needless to say, today was like Christmas morning for me. Side note – the 18th song is Fairytale feat. Jaden Smith, it wasn’t on the Deluxe Edition on iTunes.

Before I delve into my review of each song (blogger turned music critic), something needs to be pointed out – JB may or may not be the most confused adolescent of our generation, both musically and racially.

I don’t blame him, I mean, look at his mentors – Usher, Ludacris… how would you feel if you were a 12-year-old Canadian and these were your first real friends in America (besides really, really awesome)? You’d feel black.  That’s how you’d feel. Trust me, I tried it once (didn’t work out long term).

The influence is obvious in his music and his selection of featured artists:

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I’m not an expert in research analysis, but I’m noticing a bit of a trend here.

And I’m sure you’ve all heard Boyfriend, which is essentially a modern-day take on The Whisper Song by the Ying-Yang twins (also black).

For an abridged version of The Whisper Song (like a spark notes, of sorts) watch this:

Exactly.

Then there’s a song that is JB’s version of Billie Jean – I’m pretty positive MJ was black at some point. So there’s that.

He kind of sounds like Chris Brown on a lot of these songs. A couple songs are reminiscent of Boyz II Men. I feel like I have the authority to make this comparison because A) I’m right and B) Boyz II Men Greatest Hits was legitimately my first iTunes purchase ever. What? White girls like R&B too.

So there we have it: racially confused. I’m not mad about it.

As for the music…

I can’t put a genre on this album. It’s really ambiguous. Much like his sexual orientation. Let’s just say Justin is still coming into his own and is experimenting… musically….

He may have created a genre, which my friend coined as “Biebstep.” (This friend is a better music critic than I am and if you want someone who you can take seriously, check his blog here) There’s some R&B, dance, pop, and some music that I really just have no idea how to label besides “Just Listen To It, IDK.”

Let’s get into it.

(I started writing reviews for all of them and got bored, so I’m gonna just do 10 standouts)

All Around the World (feat. Ludacris)

Genre: Pop with a sprinkling of House/Rap

SUMMER JAM 2012. This is such a fun song. One of my favorites.

Boyfriend

Genre: Just Listen To It, IDK

Already reviewed above – it’s Bieber’s version of The Whisper Song.

As Long As You Love Me (feat. Big Sean)

Genre: Biebstep

A genre all it’s own. A real gem on the album. You’ll be dancing to it in the near future.

Right Here (feat. Drake)

Genre: R&B

The two hottest things to ever come out of Canada. Really showcases Biebs’s pipes. Some good riffs, etc. It’s pretty sexual. He sounds like Chris Brown a few times in this one.

Fall

Genre: Pop

My favorite. This song is the most similar to old-school Bieber (and by old-school I obviously mean 2009). It’s one of those “your voice is a cross between Fergie and Jesus,” songs. Like you just love him in this. It’s closest to the original My World style, so if you’ve been waiting for him to return to his roots, you’re in luck.

Die in Your Arms

Genre: Pop/R&B

Second Favorite. It’s soulful and beautiful. Just listen to it and love it. Songs like this are the reason I love JB. Also sounds a bit like Chris Brown here.

Thought of You

Genre: Pop/Dance

Tied for second favorite with Die in Your Arms. Fun, catchy, upbeat. It’s kind of Usher-esque. I’m not totally sure why, but it is. Work that falsetto, Biebs.

Beauty and a Beat (feat. Nicki Minaj)

Genre: Dance/Rap

Bound to be on the radio all summer. It’s rad. I’m not a big Nicki fan, and I don’t really like her part in it (like, she says buns, wiener and “Selener” … it’s dumb), but the beat of the song is great. Parental guidance is advised.

Maria

Genre: Just Listen To It, IDK

It’s BILLIE JEAN!!! IT’S JUSTIN BIEBER’S BILLY JEAN. Except it’s not even close to being as good. I’m sorry but this song is kind of snarky and weird. I have mixed feelings. She ain’t mah babyyy she ain’t mah gurlllll!!!

Love Me Like You Do

Genre: Babymaking music.

I feel like a pedophile for saying that. Moving on.

So there you have it. A pretty confusing but overall entertaining collection of Bieber’s latest work. Feel free to tell me your thoughts in the comments below. But remember, this is stuff I like, and I probably won’t care if you don’t like it.

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2 comments on “You better Beliebe it.

  1. Best three words: “It’s pretty sexual.”

  2. chobo
    June 20, 2012

    i’m a belieber

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This entry was posted on June 19, 2012 by and tagged , , , , .
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