None For Gretchen Weiners

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From the Archives: DGAF Lyfe is the Lyfe for Me

Digging deep in the archives, I found this piece I wrote at the ripe age of 22. Sitting in the drafts folder of wordpress, somehow this quick blurb/stream of consciousness never saw the light of day. After a read through, I decided people needed to see how sassy I was feeling on this day so long ago. Enjoy.


“Now that I’ve made it into my twenties, I think I’m super wise and have been around the block, and now have reached this whole phase of self-awareness and self-assurance. I’m so sure of myself now, that I feel I should rain this knowledge down upon you.

It took long enough, but I finally realized it: I like myself. A lot. And you know why? Because I’m fucking awesome. If you don’t believe that about yourself, then you’re doing it wrong. “It” being life, of course.


Like most great epiphanies, it all dawned on me while I was listening to NSYNC.

Just go with it.

So yeah, I was listening to NSYNC at work, and I thought, oh God I should probably turn this down, everyone here is gonna judge me. Let me put on something socially acceptable, people are gonna think this is super lame. But you know what’s more lame than listening to NSYNC? Pretending to not like it just to fit in. It seems simple, and some of you are probably like, “duh, this is what they teach you from day one.” But like… it’s easier said than done, amigos, so cool down.


And let me just say, as a side note (i.e., let me defend myself real quick), I have perfect pitch, can play Mozart and Chopin on the piano, and studied music theory for years… and I still think that NSYNC’s first album is hands down one of the best records ever produced. Deal with it.

All of this boils down to DGAFing. Not to be confused with the spectator sport and similar acronym, DILFing. I’ll tell you when you’re older.

DGAF is a lifestyle I’ve been adhering to for quite some time, and it’s lead me to the most internal happiness I’ve yet to encounter. When you stop caring about what other people will think and start owning who you are (regardless of how weird you actually are), you’re finally able to be truly happy.


I like mermaids. And science. And excel spreadsheets. My favorite color is pink. I listen to country music and screamo and Justin Bieber and Atmosphere.

Own what you love, DGAF about the rest. You’re awesome.”


Not much has changed in the past few years. I still don’t care what people think about me (within reason), and I’m relatively unafraid of judgement. You either get me, or you don’t. While it sounds pretentious, it’s really just self-assured… and when your self esteem is rooted on the inside, you’re a much stronger person than if you were to derive that same self esteem from external (variable, volatile) factors that can go away at any point.

This is a bit heavy of a topic for NFGW, so… happy DGAFing and I’ll see you in the next post, where I’ll likely be positing scientific theories about mythological creatures in space.


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This entry was posted on November 4, 2015 by .
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